early labor

i was working on another post for this blog the night before last, but it's pretty obsolete

the most up-to-date stuff is gonna be on facebook, so my dream of creating an epic time capsule blog post for Aria memoizing the last few hours prior to her birth is probably not going to become a reality. On the other hand, she already has 6 buddies on facebook and is 100 years old, so that's exciting!

Aria, if you have a chance to come back and read this in 20 years, just know that I spent 3 days wearing the same pajama bottoms, all the midwives and nurses agree that we had the best birth plan written up for you (presentation wise ... accuracy wise I'm sure other people hit the target much closer than we did regardless of how this pans out), and I'm never going to let your mom get rid of this outfit that she's had on -- that's going to be the centerpiece of the Aria museum. Oh yes, and we are already COMPLETELY IN LOVE WITH YOU!!!

All right kids, not much more to see here. Friend Aria on facebook or follow the action on Tai's wall. And feel free to text me at my Google Voice number (but include your name if you haven't already) and that'll make it easy for me to respond to you. I think my next step for today is going to be figuring out the technology for uploading pictures from Tai's prehistoric 2008 phone.

40 weeks pregnant- Hello due date

It appears that we're going to have a baby very very soon. I've started having consistent contractions that SUCK. You can't prepare for this pain. Just had one now. This will probably be the final post with Aria trapped inside the womb of wonder.

39 weeks and 2 days

It's time for you to come out now. My groin muscles are screaming, "We've made all this room in here for your brainy head, OCCUPY!" I'm waddling, seriously waddling and the waiting game is making me so anxious. Luckily, I've been keeping busy and having a grand ole time in these last few days with baby securely and quietly in tow. Today was especially wonderful. John surprised me for my birthday and took me to the zoo. We walked a lot and I had a few contractions and I got some great photos of John posing with various beasts.

Tomorrow I have another non-stress test and we'll get to hear Aria's heart beating for awhile then a normal midwife appointment. I'm hoping that we can get something to kick start labor because right now I'm sensing NO urgency from her about getting out of me, not even fakie contractions.

I'll be 26 years old on Saturday and I only want one thing.

Well, I have a feeling this may be our last blog post pre-Aria. Call it a hunch! Anyways, I snapped a shot of us sitting here on the bed.

37 weeks tomorrow

Alright, as I sit here Aria Clyde is beating up my abdomen and I can't say I blame her. Tight quarters at this point, especially considering that my belly button refuses to pop out and give her that extra centimeter of space.

Lately my life has consisted of moving stuff from one area to another, packing boxes, shuffling more stuff, wondering whether or not I'll need a particular item in the next 3 weeks, taping boxes and putting John's muscles to the test. My house is 80% cleared out which is satisfying.

John is back in Mountain View, CA starting his 2nd week of work today after a lovely weekend together here in Seattle. We took a 2 day "Bringing Baby Home" workshop which actually turned out to be a parenting/relationship preserver class. It was nice to have the time assigned to think about how are lives are about to drastically change. We are in such a good spot with each other and the class just reinforced that. I miss him already though. He'll be coming back on Friday and staying for a week. It sure would be convenient for Aria to join us during that time too.

Body check: It is getting really difficult to get around. My joints are fussy and my muscles super duper sore. I am moving at a much slower pace and it is pretty frustrating. I am very glad that I am only getting these pregnancy symptoms now though as I know this could've been my condition starting much sooner.

Last night was the Lost finale- I'm still unraveling what happened in my mind, but I guess I'm a little lost.

Golly

Here is a super duper quick update because it has been nearly a month since my last post. Things are pretty hectic around here but very exciting. I've had an incredible month, kicking off with a much-needed trip to NY where the fam held a successful 2-day garage sale extravaganza then a SURPRISE BABY SHOWER which was incredible to say the least. I couldn't believe all the people that came out- it was the perfect way to see everyone in a short period of time (and of course get supplies for baby Aria). I had so much fun! Aunt Michele orchestrated the whole affair and Sandra was the perfect hostess. The food was delish, I loved being around all the kids and the weather was warm and lovely. PERFECT DAY! I can't thank everyone enough, seriously.

The rest of the week was spent clearing out the room, packing stuff up to ship to the west coast and thinking about where John's job prospects were going to land us. As it turns out, he got a phone call when we landed in Seattle with a job offer in Cali. We both let out a big sigh of relief after he accepted the offer and finally had something concrete to grasp to. Since then he has been taking care of logistics with his company as far as the move to San Francisco and we've started packing out both of our apartments (his first, since we haven't lived there in well over 5 months). We've made A LOT of progress in the past week and it feels really awesome to be productive.

This weekend was amazing too. Saturday we went to about 25 garage sales in West Seattle and got a ton of quality baby things for cheap cheap cheap. The whole backseat of the car was full of toys, gear and miscellaneous stuff. John got himself an electric shaver which has been put to good use everyday since the purchase making him super smooth and super happy.

Next up Sunday, the day I've been looking forward to for a LONG time- my Seattle Family baby shower, coordinated by Aja and Alie. First though, we went to breakfast with Debbie & Dave (John's parents who came up for the shower from CA) and Nancy & Rod (John's aunt and uncle from Portland) then headed over to Clanci's house for the big event. Aja did such an incredible job of decorating, using my unofficial but apparently undeniable favorite color of orange. There were mini sandwiches (one of which I privately stuffed in its entirety into my mouth), veggies, nuts, fruit salad and SWEDISH MEATBALLS compliments of Alie!! Aja had a candy shoppe spread that was BEAUTIFUL. I'm not even going to attempt to describe, I need to get a hold of a photo. I will say that I am impressed to see her glassware obsession be put to such good use.

We played shower games including trivia and name this baby animal. Lillie and Yontz cheated the whole time. There was also onesie decorating and an album for people to write letters to baby Aria. It was wonderful, every last bit of it.

I was totally exhausted afterwards and immediately went to sleep. The past few days have been packing and planning and more packing and planning- all which has been made a hell of a lot easier with Debbie & Dave in town.

Right now I'm sitting out in the sun in our front yard soaking up some vit. D and finishing up some work tasks. I'll be glad when I don't have to worry about work anymore.

So finally- John starts work on Monday and we are headed to SF on Friday to look at apartments. I'll be back in Seattle by Monday to continue the packing process and get work done. I'm so excited for all of these changes and I'm not really phased by the timing of it (I'm 35 weeks preggers as of yesterday). Maybe in the next 5 weeks I'm going to suddenly be physically miserable or totally overwhelmed by all the work, but for right now we're just happily truckin along.

I guess my quick update turned into a long one, haha. Until next time (which will be sooner, scout's honor)!

just laying next to tai (she's been passed out for a couple hours) and watching survivor -- i was thinking how awesome it's gonna be to be in our own apartment and have Aria nearby in a crib and listen to her crying and stuff. i am really excited and i can't wait :)

tai just rolled onto her back and now she's doing the moan snores. up until a month or two ago i had never heard anything like them. tai's breathing isn't obstructed, she just says hmmmmmmmmmmmmm over and over. maybe they will both do that!

98 days to baby- 28 weeks pregz

Just a quick post.

Lately I've been crocheting and eating pizza a lot with Aja. Here is a squid toy for baby to eventually slobber on.

It also occurs to me that I should take some photos of the baby clothes that I've been gifted and ones that I've amassed on my own these past few months as I just took a call from my mom describing baby dresses and headbands while at the store to see if I want them. I've been reading a lot of crafting blogs and I like how some of them make "top 10" lists of pretty much anything you can think of. Maybe I should make a top 10 of crafting blogs that I like. Well, where I am going with this is the awesome graphics these bloggers make showing off their crafts.

Yesterday on the way to the pool I fell and jammed up my knee. It is hurting more than a typical scrape. Here's what it looks like
I was more upset that I ripped a giant hole in my maternity pants that I wear pretty much everyday. This comes after leaning down to pick something up in them last week and completely busting open the elastic waist. Yeah- breaking an elastic waist does wonders for your ego. So John, of course seeing the upside, was like- well at least it's the pants that you already broke!! ughhh. Now I'll have to start breaking in the other pair of maternity pants (I say this while wearing the damaged jeans).

My mom keeps bugging me for a pregnant belly photo. I'll get on it soon- promise.

CountDOWN begins = 103 days till baby (27 weeks pregnant)

As I type, I have this odd form of heartburn where there is no actual acid refluxing up to my mouth, just a warm, burning sensation deep down in my throat that flares up. It's real pleasant.

I'm 27 weeks pregnant and I've been pretty awesome with getting more advanced with my crocheting. Here is an alien thing that I made the other day.


I also painted this onto a box that I got for toting craft supplies

It is becoming more difficult to get out of bed. This forces me to test the limits of my bladder every morning. Aria's kicking and shifting and boxing has become much more frequent and a hell of a lot stronger. It definitely seems as though she responds to John's voice almost immediately while ignoring my own petitions. If I'm away at a meeting for a few hours, I'll come home and as soon as he starts talking she is excitedly moving around. Of course, the increased movement could be a result of sugar reaching her amniotic fluid but that would mean I must be stuffing my mouth with like, starburst and cherry fruit snacks and sobe fruit punch everytime I leave the house which would be totally unlike me.

We've submerged ourselves entirely in the first-time parent thing by enrolling in a Lamaze class and going swimming almost everyday. Both of these have been fantastic for us as a pair. I'll speak for myself, but Lamaze has been a guided way of making us think about what is going on and how we will thrive as a couple during labor (and beyond). It feels really good to know that John wants to be as supportive as humanly possible (as usual) and educated along with me about pregnancy. I know this is going to extend into our parenthood and how awesome is that?

Swimming everyday has been significant too. Physically, swimming makes me feel revitalized in a way that I don't know I've ever experienced. After an hour in the pool, my body feels flexible and my skin is tingling from what I assume to be improved circulation. I never expected to feel so good after a "workout". Having this routine with John has been so much fun too. It's a "thing" that we "do". I love that our schedule allows for it and I get to see John wait in line with a bunch of 4-10 year olds for the rope swing. I also love watching him do aqua jogging for 5 minutes for reasons I'm sure I don't need to explain.

Tonight I'm preoccupied with thinking about the next few months and how they will pan out as far as John's working/living situation. I feel slightly unsettled and want more answers than usual. At the last Lamaze class we talked about labor coping strategies and the role the partner will play. If John relocates between now and June, I suppose I'm feeling anxious about how my pre-labor will go without him by my side. I don't know that this will be the case but the thought isn't easy to tuck away. Hopefully we'll have some concrete answers this week and we can start projecting our 3 month plan.

By the way, the women's locker room at the Ballard pool is a crazy place with a LOT of nudity. Nudity and conversation, nudity with strange children around and nudity with communal showers and soap dispensers.

release

I'm going to use a very dumb analogy to describe what I think is about to happen.

A while back Tai downloaded Sims 2. We got rid of it a couple weeks later but that's beside the point. The point is that while I was playing it, there got to be certain times in the game where things slipped out of my control and next thing I knew I had a house with like 4 people walking around peeing their pants, starving to death, talking to an imaginary bunny, washing themselves in the sink and so on. Every time I tried to tell one of them to go take a shower, he'd go in, the shower was broken, he'd look through the 4th wall at me and complain, the other guy would come in to use the toilet, the toilet was broken. The dad got fired from his job because he hadn't bathed or slept, the kid would come in on the bus from school and pass out in the driveway, it just went on and on.

At some point, through whatever wizardry, I figured out how to turn the corner on that game. First the repairman came in and fixed the shower and the toilet. They were all still starving and hallucinating but at least the hygiene and bathroom meters started getting under control. I managed to get a family member to cook a damn meal without stopping in the middle to run and climb in bed. Little by little the general sense of everyone getting diverted away from A to focus on B, then diverted away from B to focus on C, then from C to D, then back to A (without anything ever getting resolved) started to dissipate and I was able to play the damn game.

My feeling is that many layers of tension are on the verge of being released and that Tai and I are soon going to have a dramatic increase in our ability to do what we actually want to be doing at any given point in time vs what we've been able to do for the last little while. This may be very much the opposite of what people say having a child is like -- that it increases the number of fires you have to put out at all points day and night -- and I'm not doubting that at all, I'm just saying that in the next couple of months I think we are going to be able to make a ton of stressful situations disappear and take a lot of weight off our backs.

As I write this I'm conscious of a very tight feeling in my chest which has probably been there for several days and for good reason, and it's not going to be gone tonight or by the time I wake up in the morning, but I'm really looking forward to feeling it decompress bit by bit as more and more of what I consider to be distractions are cleared away and replaced with continuity and, dare I say, accomplishment.

Day 160- 25 weeks pregnant

15 weeks to go. Wow!

I got some photos in the mail today. When I moved here I brought along a handful of used film containers that I intended to process. These bad boys are REALLY old. Here is a sampling:

Richie Daniels in a nutshell circa 2003

My friend Gabby- oddly enough I received the cutest gift in the mail from her today with the photos.

How many times I saw the commercial on TV for this, paired with my unhealthy childhood obsession with cats, and I STILL DIDN'T SEE IT.

And while I'm at it here are some others from various sources:Baby John

Semi Baby Tai


John HS

Day 159 - If you're going to San Francisco make sure to bring Frizz Ease for your hair

Well, we are both back safe and sound in Seattle from our fun-filled excursion to San Francisco Mon-Weds. Hopefully things work out future-wise so we can start filling in the blanks as far as what city we'll be living in, where our daughter will spend at least the first few years of her life and, as the subject reveals, what kind of hair products I will be needing to invest in. By the time I got back to Seattle, I was half expecting some little baby sparrows to peak their heads out of my hair with its new nest-like qualities.

San Francisco is really sunny. I mean, maybe I've been in denial about Seattle weather- yea it drizzles frequently, but when it's sunny it's pleasant and normal. I felt like I was staring into the sun most of the time while there. I drove over the Golden Gate Bridge (two times as I was typing that I typed "Gordon Gate") and on the return journey when I came out of a tunnel through a mountain, I thought I was going to have to pull over because I was just absolutely blinded by the sun. Maybe my eyes have just become accustomed to indirect overcast sunlight. I don't know. Anyway, the more I explored SF the more I liked it. John was busy kicking ass with a job interview so all of this exploration was done solo (with baby girl hanging out within, of course).

The night we arrived, after spending some time at Carlos's awesome apartment, we headed to the hotel in Mountain view. Frankly, Mountain View is like a typical higher class Long Island town which gave me the yuuuuhhhlll chills. If I had to name which town on LI, I'd say Manhasset. So for about 1/4 of the people who grudgingly read this blog- there is your visual. I was thinking to myself, Yikes, I'm not sure if this is the kind of place I'm looking to spend any significant amount of time and psyching myself out on the whole deal (privately- I didn't share this with John before his interview; call it consideration?) The next day I hopped on the train into SF (about an hour ride north) squinting the whole way (re previous paragraph), I was also not very excited about the flatness of the landscape or the spanish style one-level housing abundance. My critical analysis is about to take a positive turn now- once I got into SF my opinion about everything was much brighter. There is a lot of personality, natural beauty and charm there. I did find that my usually accurate mental GPS was not functioning at all, which was a huge bummer. I tell John all the time I like to get lost and then find my way which is difficult once you've become familiar with the territory and here I was with a whole new map and I was like barely able to orient north from south.

When John came back from his interview we walked quite a ways downtown and ate at some place that seemed like it might be mexican due to the font of their signage but in fact was more like a diner without the gaudy greek mirrors and soulvaki. On the walk back to Carlos's place I fell and scraped my knee and both of us were complaining like true athletes about the state of our feet from such a trek- mine were swollen and getting grinded up against my sneakers and John was essentially wearing water shoes- I can just hear his reaction to this when he reads "Tai, those shoes are PRAAADDAAAAHHHS!"

We spent the evening with Carlos, Jesse, Ajit and Carly watching Alice in Wonderland and Lost and the next morning I woke up day/nightdreaming about eating cocoa pebbles.

All in all, I really enjoyed SF. It is very different to move to a new city under the premise of a longer, more permanent stay. When I moved to Seattle I was committing to a year; after 6 months I realized I could happily spend the rest of my life here but enjoyed the flexibility. If we end up moving anywhere, it will be for a longer stretch of time for sure and that context is odd. Of course the case isn't shut. I'm still rooting for Seattle- I'd like to continue working for the Center and be surrounded by the familiar but I'm also up for a big change and carving out a new life somewhere with John and Aria. Yea, we've pretty much decided her name is Aria so shout it from the rooftops. We'll let you know if that changes, and I'll probably insert it nonchalantly at the end of another blog post to weed out our less than avid readership. See ya!

Oh also I did a very shitty job of taking photos in SF. The only thing I captured was this:

Why even bother, you ask? I thought it was cool because of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21TmsT1qsPo

Day 150- Travels

Portland, Portland, Portland! That is where we were this past weekend. It was awesome getting to meet all of John's family in one big lump so they are more than just an abstract family tree to me. The purpose behind the trip was to attend John's grandma's memorial service on Saturday afternoon. We woke up early and got ourselves on the road (a 3 hour ride from Seattle) and made it down there just in time for the event. We went to his Aunt Nancy's afterwards and watched a lot of Olympic curling. I can't dismiss the fact that I kindof got into watching men in booties slide rocks on ice.

The next day we had a nice, slow vacation-like start to the day and eventually went to brunch with Nancy's family. I managed to dish myself out a perfect serving of food from the buffet, which is really no easy task. I'll usually find myself at restaurants with a ton of food still on my plate feeling really compelled by mysterious forces to clean my plate or at least stuff as much in as possible leaving me feeling like a holiday turkey bird. We headed over to Skidmore bluffs to Kirsten's picnic after saying our goodbyes to the Boutins and played Scrabble and ate with a bunch of people on a blanket in the sun. It was wonderful. Kirsten made this tuna salad with craisens in it that I couldn't stop eating and also her famous melt-away cookies that are BOMB DOT COM.

We then went to "dinner" with John's parents (I was feeling like I was a machine built for eating at this point) and I opted out of ordering a meal for the sake of keeping at least some room in my belly reserved for a fetus. Portland weather was amazing and after a quick stop at Goodwill we were on the road back to Seattle. The ride home went by really quick as John and I talked pretty much incessantly about anything and everything. To be completely honest, at one point I started looking forward to telling John that I wanted to stop to get a doughnut at the well-known Krispy Kreme right off of the interstate but probably by divine intervention realized that we had already passed it while deep in conversation.

In other news, mom's surgery has been postponed indefinitely due to an infection in her toe and I'm waiting for a call back now to understand how exactly my brother ended up in the ER cubicle next to hers when he passed out while visiting her yesterday. I hope it was just passing out (like how he did at the Bodies exhibit, (haha THAT'S RIGHT- I'M EXPOSING YOU!) and not something more serious. In the meantime, I can't say that I'm disappointed that my mom is not having the surgery. If her body just isn't ready for it right now then we need to listen to that and act accordingly.

Finally, Seattle, please give me the sun back. This overcast business is unacceptable.

Day 144- Crafting Enthusiast

I'm going to go ahead and ruin the surprise for some of you: I've sent out the most awesome cards ever created today. Yes, they were just a little over a month late finally getting into the mailbox, but as I wrote on a few that explicitly stated "Happy New Year!" better late than never. Let's hope that's not the tune we'll be humming in June as my belly turns into a 15 lb baby-bearing freak show.

Now to further spoil the surprise, here is just a sampling of the cards Aja, Ronda and I made because we are CRAFTING ENTHUSIASTS.

and here is one of John wearing a baby hat for good measure

Day 142- Rotund

I am aware that this is just the beginning of the feeling huge situation, but I feel like someone put an air pump to my belly button and forgot to unlatch. It doesn't even feel like baby, it feels like ROUND. It is the opposite of when you walk around sucking your stomach in, I'll be walking around and thinking, am I trying to be a large-gutted person?

I don't have too much to report. We had the 2nd anatomy screen with the same dim-witted ultrasound tech who said, AGAIN that she couldn't tell us (confirm) the gender. Feeling really glad we went and paid someone else to tell us otherwise we'd potentially find out on birth day. Baby's head was measuring a little bit long, so we have another US scheduled for the end of March which is when I will also take my glucose test. The long-headedness is most likely due to her being low this whole time.

Valentine's day was pretty laid back. I went with Aja for pedicures and then we double dated for dinner at Shultzys. My toes are pink.

going in for another

i'm a little surprised that tai hasn't posted anything since my last one, but i guess that's how these things go ... you blow something off for two months and then you get around to doing it and start checking back twice a day and wondering why everyone else's feedback loop isn't instantaneous. or maybe that's just me.

so we're going in tomorrow at 1 for the official redo on the ultrasound (it amazes to think that if we played by the book it would be this late in the game before we found out she's a girl).

now i've had like 0 appointments on my schedule for the past little while, and i was emailing people about interviews at the end of last week and they were like "ok well when can we talk to you next week" 'well, pretty much whenever you want'. so they come back "you're scheduled on wednesday at 1"

this morning i'm looking at that and looking at tai's calendar ... oh shit, ok i have to change that. so i call them back and it takes like 4 hours to fix and i said "you know, i'm gonna be tied up between 11 and 3, so ..." and they're like "ok, we moved it to 3".

meanwhile, this afternoon we're all caught up in the drama with the swat team taking down the bank robber next door, and suddenly the phone rings and they wanna confirm tai's OTHER appointment which i believe is the midwife, and that's tomorrow at 2:45 after she's done with the ultrasound. ohhhhhh jeez.

^^oh, right, i was working on a blog entry. unfortunately tai's new laptop decided to reboot itself a few hours ago which was awesome. i actually can't write much more about this, but suffice it to say i will have to take a phone screen in the middle of the second medical appointment, which is slightly odd because i think the last non-ultrasound appointment also coincided with my interview day downtown. yeesh.

oops

I had a post I was working on after the 2nd ultrasound and I realized I didn't finish it and it would be a little untimely. Sigh .... oh well

We've obviously had a lot of time now to think about the name of our baby girl. I took a day and wrote a web service to generate random names incorporating combinations of Daniels and Clyde and hyphen and had it be slightly adaptive but it still made a bunch of horrible suggestions that made a lot of people doubt the seriousness of the endeavor. Still it was viewed by about 150 different people and to my knowledge only one person tried to hack it, so it was pretty good, and it gave me a look into my subconscious as far as name preferences. When we were watching her suck amniotic fluid the name Adelia was stuck in my head although it sounded slightly off and I thought maybe Adele or something like that. I dunno. The name generator picked a lot of gemstones like Sapphire, Emerald *** oh my god, the computer just asked me if I wanted to reboot and of course I was typing and hitting space bar 1.5 times per second and it interpreted that as a "yes" -- I seriously want to train this laptop to become a sentient being and give it a cyborg body just so I can fight it to the death ***

ok so yeah, names like Sapphire, Emerald, Ivory (not a gemstone, but ...), Amethyst ... things like that got big points. The name Marseilles Siobhan randomly came up and I kindof liked it -- Tai thinks you can't use the name Marseilles if you've never been there *shrug* ... I like how it's got a French thing and an Irish thing going on simultaneously which sounds about right. Anyways, I dunno. I always pictured going with a -ia name and we thought about Magnolia and Aria and I'm very tempted to run with Aria. In a lot of ways I think she is starting to be Aria in my head. The one mitigating factor is that my favorite book series (i shouldn't say "my favorite" -- scientific polls have established it as the best book series) ASOIAF has a character named Arya whose nickname around the castle is "Arya Horseface", and there's a very good chance that ASOIAF could become an HBO sensation in the next 3 years on par with Lost (people forget this, but lord of the rings was somewhat obscure to the mainstream up until 7 or 8 years ago ... anyone who named their son Legolas or Smeagol in the 80s or early 90s probably set them up for an uneventful first several years followed by a "whoa why the hell did you name me that?!" period after the movie came out) -- ok so what am I saying. I like the name Aria but it's a gamble. Then there's the middle-name-candidate "Esme" oi ... i just googled it and people are talking about Twilight. Well that could be annoying, who knows.

Anyways, working on the name thing, working on figuring out what our 5 year plan is ... I do feel a bit dispirited on that front but ... it really is a situation where only one thing has to go right and then you can figuratively "coast" for a bit. So I guess it's not surprising that while waiting for one thing to go right, there would be a period where no things go right (in case there's any ambiguity, I'm talking about job search / deciding where to live -- the "nothing going right" only refers to that, not relationship or pregnancy or picking a name). I also think it's important for me and Tai to remember that what we have *right now* is something that probably 90-95% of people in the world would be happy to trade for, as far as an environment for our child, access to food, clothing, high speed internet, learning materials, etc ... there is a lot of desire in both of us to move forward, improve our surroundings, make room for a crib, set regular hours for work, activities, etc, and that is because there is so much potential that is not being realized yet, but the fact that we're only at 40% or whatever isn't necessarily cause to despair, and I just need to remember this every time I'm writing a mindnumbing email to some person on Craigslist knowing that they will probably only print off the first page of my resume and spend 20 minutes arguing with me over --- ahh but i digress

I just took 45 minutes off from writing this to rub lotion on Tai's belly and watch biggest loser on the internet and while I was doing that little Aria was kicking my hand something fierce. So much for her being the size of a blueberry!

Day 122- Yea, I'm awake and 19 weeks pregnant

I'm up doing work. I think the past week of sleeping 10-12 hours a night is finally catching up to me. I feel like I'm unstoppable as I process to-dos and get rid of the hideous stack of stuff in my physical inbox.

Anyway, I'm 19 weeks pregnant. I forgot to mention at the last ultrasound John noticed that the baby weighed 11oz which is about 3oz bigger than a typical 18 weeker.

I haven't done one of these in awhile, so here is what's officially going on inside my womb this week:

Your baby's sensory development is exploding! Her brain is designating specialized areas for smell, taste, hearing, vision, and touch. Some research suggests that she may be able to hear your voice now, so don't be shy about reading aloud, talking to her, or singing a happy tune if the mood strikes you. Your baby weighs about 8 1/2 ounces and measures 6 inches, head to bottom — about the size of a large heirloom tomato. Her arms and legs are in the right proportions to each other and the rest of her body now. Her kidneys continue to make urine and the hair on her scalp is sprouting. A waxy protective coating called the vernix caseosa is forming on her skin to prevent it from pickling in the amniotic fluid.

In financial news, I made some money off of the baby's sex, see winnings below

Yep, and that's John's $5 boy wager below it, currently sitting nice and cozy in my wallet. The baby pool was compliments of Dan Hurwitz, the final standings were 3 boy/3 girl. Dan was betting girl with me and is pushing for the name Danielle.

Here are some other things I was putting off posting

This is a video of Christmas in Seattle and a tour of the apartment:

And here is cutie with Christmas goodies in view:

Goodnight!

I love the mailman

Woke up this morning to banging at the front door. John brought in the CWD laptop I ordered to replace the fried one and then started carting in large yellow and blue bins. I was very confused until I realized that he ordered GROCERIES from amazon fresh direct.

It feels really cool to be in the presence of a carton of honey nut cheerios and 2 cases of tomato soup, a case of Classico tomato sauce and a variety of other items John decided we needed.


So much for laying off the double plus food talk. But come on- this is noteworthy.

Day 117 - Oh yes

Just came back from coordinating the monthly dinner lecture series with my work. I've become great friends with the lead server at the dinner club named Solomon. Tonight he came up to me at the end and whispered in my ear,

"Tai, we have some left over food, do you want it?"

I'm not even sure why I asked this but I did
"What kind of food?" (as if it mattered)

"Cake, ..."
I interrupt by moaning in agreement"
"Chicken"
"Yes, I'll take it"

So at the end of the night he hands me a bag of food. When I got home I intercepted John about to heat up some microwave thing and popped open with bag
Box number one: FULL OF CAKE (ABOUT TEN SLICES)
Box number two: full of chicken and veggies
BOX NUMBER THREE: FULL OF CAKE (ABOUT TEN SLICES)
NEED I SAY MORE?

I'm going to try hard not to make this blog the life and food intake of tai john and little fetal mother teresa, but I couldn't help but highlight how awesome it is that Solomon gave me two boxes of cake because it assumes that I somehow can and will handle the cake with grace and ease in a timely manner.

Her debut

Day 116 - Biggest joyful heart ever

It's official, this beautiful healthy baby suspended in my belly is a GIRL!

Here are some photos:

Day 115 - Groan x 1,000,000

This week has been pretty difficult for me (aside from Pedis & greek food with Sarai :).

List of things bothering me:
1)General "down" feeling
2) Dormant feelings about family being awoken
3) Didn't find out the gender of the baby
4) New chair of CWD board resigning
5) Feeling underappreciated by work
6) Head feels full of dead energy, hurt feelings, anger and disappointment


List of things making me feel better:
1) John

I wish I had a loud speaker that amplified volume to the world so I could use it to go
"UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" for like 5 minutes.

Day 114- Sheesh

It's been a rough day and I'm feeling stressed but tomorrow is going to bring lots of joy! 12 more hours until the big reveal.

:) :) :D

Day 111- Lay off me

I just ate 2 bowls of chocolate peanut butter tillamook ice cream. When I came into the room with the second bowl, John was like, "Oh you got some ice cream?" which is cool because it's like the first bowl never existed until I post this blog.

Day 108 - 17 weeks preggo and 1 week till the big reveal

Oh man, when I start to think about knowing the gender everything gets really REAL. Of course, thinking about a lot of things makes it real, especially the cost of alone/john & tai / recreation time increasing dramatically- the story of parenthood of course.

Today I made calls that I should've made at least a week ago and it felt good to touch base with people. Sometimes I feel really overwhelmed by the phone, I guess because I always feel like 1) I can't really gauge how long a person wants to be on the phone with me and 2) I'm a terrible "recapper". I was talking about this with the girls earlier this week. My mom is an expert phone storyteller. I remember sitting in my room when I was younger listening to my mom tell the same story to 4 different people and being totally captivated every time. Not only that, but the story would usually be about what she and I did that day, so it's like- I just experienced everything she talked about firsthand and was still drawn into it. Usually I'm capable of recapping once to one person, MAYBE. Mostly because I feel like something becomes somewhat less important after I've talked about it with one person. Typically the first person I talk to will say:
"So what's new?"
and I'll tell them whatever news I have, we'll exchange ideas, I'll probably walk away from the conversation being touched in some way or another by their comments, ideas, reflections, blah blah blah. Then I talk to the next person and they say:
"So, what's new?"
and now, it's not new anymore. It's old because I already unloaded it.

I don't know. I think I just have to get over it and be a better communicative person via phone.

That's the end of that thought.

Other news of the past week:
1) Belly is getting bigger, harder and higher on my torso. Very cool
2) John's grandmother passed away which bums me out as I wish I could've met her
3) John and I saw Daybreakers, a vampire movie with the right idea and wrong everything else
4) Got turned away from seeing Avatar and eating at Blue C Sushi (sold out and closed, respectively)
5) Both of us have been pretty organization/goal oriented lately. I think I'm going to make a master list of goals called "101 Goals in 1001 Days" to try to record what's important to me in the next 2.75 years. John's making a database which connects smaller goals to bigger ones. It's pretty cool to follow benefit paths to see how something small you are doing is contributing to the big picture.
6) Everything is quite peaceful. Seems like a lot of things became very solid and well, peaceful since we found out we're having a baby. I feel like John is my rock, as corny as that sounds. We're totally committed and really excited about shaping our future and having a family.
7) I'm looking forward to mapping out the future with my mom moving to Seattle (and in a perfect world, Tim too :). It makes me happy to know that she will be a part of my life and growing family here as she blossoms into a person who is independent, optimistic and content. I know transitions take time and energy both physically and emotionally but I am completely confident that no matter what we'll figure everything out. It sure would be great to have both grandmothers (and Dave:) living nearby.

Whew that was a handful of thoughts!

Alright, well, I'm really excited to know girl/boy at this point. I'm still keeping my cool but man oh man it's like when you have to pee and finally find a toilet and start fumbling with your zipper. I'm just so close yet have to WAIIT.

OH- another thing that made it REALLY real was receiving our first baby gift in the mail yesterday!!!!! That was super exciting although John tried to open it without me there with him (FOUL BALL JOHN) but couldn't get it out of the package and ultimately we opened it together. THANK YOU AUNT SHELLY!!! It's a padded cover for shopping carts/restaurant booster seats. John took it out of the plastic wrap and sortof draped it over himself like a bra which I must say is a pretty good idea for my rapidly growing bosom in the meantime.

In conclusion, I ate steak tonight. Eat your heart out Mom, Ronda and vegetarians of the world. Yea, this fetus likes meat and I'm okay with that.


Man, I am REALLY excited to know if it's a girl or boy

monitor

We're about to head to the bank. I was just checking out the blog, thinking about what to write, and then emmett showed me this, which I've gotta figure out how to add to the registry http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/new_grown_up_monitor_allows

Day 97- 4 months pregnant

Today marks week 16 of being pregnant. To follow up on Wednesday's appointment, we dropped John off in the early morn to his appointment and Debbie and I went to Group Health for mine. Once in the room, all the routine checks were done and we were lucky enough to get an ultrasound. As soon as she placed the joystick on my belly, I saw legs doing a bicycling motion. It was amazing! She moved it around and we could get a good look at this big baby in there. I couldn't believe it wasn't a gummy bear/teddy graham anymore. It was laying there with its big brainy head on the left side and was quite active, moving legs and arms around. Debbie pointed out the spine, ribs and heart too. It was an incredible vision. I still don't feel very pregnant and I don't look it either. I know it is a matter of time before I'm rounded out, so I'm not feeling at all anxious about it.

Last night John and I went to Lillie's wedding and had a great time. Lillie looked gorgeous and the general theme of the wedding was "peacock" in an ultra-classy way. It was really nice to start the new year/decade off with her celebration. We got home from Tacoma at like 1:20am and I felt like death and slept like death. All day today I've been napping and I must admit, it felt pretty good.

Next big task on my agenda: Tell work that I'm pregnant. Not looking forward to it even though I'm sure it's going to be fine. If a women's empowerment organization has issues with my pregnancy, there's obviously something wrong with that picture.

Oh, so ultimately, we didn't find out the gender on Wednesday. The machine was "too old" and it was a side view of the baby- a guess really wasn't feasible. My next appointment will be January 19th- THAT'S when we'll know the correct pronoun for the air biker in my abdomen. I can't wait until I start feeling the motion of this baby cross-training down there, joyous.